Here is the last import from Advocacy and the Like. After this entry they should all be about recent happenings or ramblings. Happy reading!
It was an early morning yesterday for me. I woke up, as usual, with my fiancee at 5:55 to make his lunch before he headed out at six. As he tried to start up his car it wouldn't the ignition would not catch so it could start up. I sat up with him for a little while and waited until he could get his car to start, which kept me awake until about seven or so. After he was finally able to leave for work I headed back to bed to try and sleep for a few more hours like usual. Unfortunately for me I could not quite find what I needed to fall sleep again. Instead, I laid in bed until closer to eight until deciding that it was time for me to get out of bed.
It was an early morning yesterday for me. I woke up, as usual, with my fiancee at 5:55 to make his lunch before he headed out at six. As he tried to start up his car it wouldn't the ignition would not catch so it could start up. I sat up with him for a little while and waited until he could get his car to start, which kept me awake until about seven or so. After he was finally able to leave for work I headed back to bed to try and sleep for a few more hours like usual. Unfortunately for me I could not quite find what I needed to fall sleep again. Instead, I laid in bed until closer to eight until deciding that it was time for me to get out of bed.
I sat in the room my fiancé and I share together and played Pokemon: Heart Gold - yes I did just type that - for a while and then played around on Facebook until about twelve o'clock, which leads me to the main purpose of this entry. Around that time I sat down at the kitchen table to eat what was left over of my Subway dinner from the previous night. I was still the only one in my house awake since my mom went back to bed, my dad was out running errands, and my sister still had not found herself a purpose to get out of bed.
While sitting there I thought, "Wow, this is a pretty lonely setting. I wonder why I'm not scared?" For you who don't know much about me I have an incredible fear of being alone, among many other irrational fears. As I thought about this for a while I came to the conclusion that it wasn't so much as experiencing loneliness as it was a sense of serenity. It was a pleasant feeling; one that I don't usually feel when I'm by myself.
In the quiet of the early afternoon I was able to collect my thoughts on random things without the ruckus of my family roaming around and going about doing their business. I also contemplated whether or not I could ever get used to the feeling of being alone. Hopefully I won’t, seeing as how I don't really communicate well with others in the first place, and to my dismay I seem to be turning into sort of an introverted person. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with being an introvert, just that I don’t remember changing from being my normal, extroverted self.
Upon closing, I came to the conclusion that this sort of serene feeling would be nice to experience every once in a while, so as to not get used to it. I also love the company of my close friends and family too much to make being alone my lifestyle.
~~“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.” -C.S. Lewis
